Welcome back once again!
This time we move on to the Fancy Dans, the Champagne Charlies, the utter scum-sucking gutter trash that infest the NBFL. For these gents, three yards and a cloud of dust is something for neanderthals and it to be studiously avoided. The only dirt they want on their uniforms comes from the splash back of a fan falling into a puddle from the bleachers.
All jokes aside, there are some real excitement machines among this lot. No pass is too far! No touchdown is out of reach when you have a strong passing game. In any event, this list has a strong representation from our Elven brothers as is right and proper.
The first award we have The Golden Arm award for most completions…
Well, well, well. As Buddy Ryan would (probably) have said, “Get this chuck and duck rubbish outta here!”. When comparing the likes of Heath Shuler and Spike Glennon II to our winner Jeremy Macklin [KC] the variance in offensive philosophies becomes clear. That being said, Macklin was instrumental in a solid first up season for the Deviants.
Honourable Mentions: Heath Shuler and Spike Glennon II obviously went for style points. According to our sources, these two were far more concerned with the other passing award for the most passing yards. We can clearly see their average distance was much greater but that probably highlights the difference in styles between the various Elves.
Next we have The Memorial Justin Zipp Air It Out award. This award is in memoriam of the incomparable Justin Zipp of Oakland who burned bright in the firmament until an untimely demise.
And we can see the results! Shuler and Glennon II were out in front of Harason [WILL] with a very impressive season. Congratulations to Heath Shuler though who managed an excellent 123 passing yards which was 27 ahead of second place. Leading the Frailskins to the playoffs, Shuler continues to show the way for the disciples of the long bomb.
Honourable Mentions: Spike Glennon II was also very good as an important part of a strong Smokeaneers lineup. The Smokeaneers were very string during the regular season and look to be a contender in the playoffs. Will they rely on Spike’s arm? Do they have the chops to go all the way? Who knows? As for Devin “Odin” Harason [WILL], the rest of the team were way off the pace after their rather long hiatus from the league. Hmmm. Where have we seen a team return to that benighted city and struggle thereafter in contrast to past glories?
Surely that’s never happened before? Has it? It has you say? Huh. What are the odds?
So there we have the second part of our awards season. Some excellent aerial performances and we can’t wait to see what some of our leaders can do in the cauldron of the playoffs.
Next up: The Bulldozers and Best (Rushing and Most Touchdowns) – Stay tuned!
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